Non-Blog: A feminine response to things going wrong
- Mar, 01 2021
- By Andrea M. Winn
- Healing from Shambhala, Love, Well-being
- 2 comments
In the midst of things going wrong, wouldn’t you love to feel that everything’s going to be okay? My aim in this non-blog is for you to have a felt experience of “Everything’s going to be okay”, and for you to be able to bring that felt experience into anything that may be going “wrong” in your life.
Okay, let’s set the scene…
Exhibit 1: I was brought up in a Tibetan Buddhist community with systemic corruption and sexualized violence. Crappy! A lot going wrong! And my response has been to put integrity as my number one value in how I live my life.
Exhibit 2: Last July I committed to offer a blog of value every month for one year to my deeply honoured Tribe.
Exhibit 3: This week the blog for March was just not happening.
Yikes! What happened this week?
- No one responded to the February community needs survey, so I had no point of focus
- Thursday I went to work on the Blog and was guided to a 2 hour program on Unicorns. I purchased the program and then did the program, and was introduced to my Unicorn guide, Blue.
- Blue said to let the transformation of the Unicorn program gel for a few days
- Fast forward to Saturday. I went to the park and had a wonderful experience feeding chickadees sunflower seeds by hand. Many of them came that day. I love the experience of their little feet grasping my finger and their happiness in plucking a couple of seeds from my palm. Very special! And I stayed longer than planned feeding the chickadees.
- I returned home to write the blog, and Blue advised me to take a nap. The nap was great!
- But still no blog…
Now remember: Integrity is my main value. I was entering into the soul crushing domain after promising you a blog and having no blog to offer.
I set up my diffusor Saturday night at bed time with an essential oil blend called, “Surrender,” because it seemed the sane direction to go at that point.
Sunday I reached out to my good friend and colleague, Diane Young, and ran my dilemma by her. Diane has a lovely warm, wise and flowing way about her. She responded, “Why not write about this process, because everyone has had the experience of something not working as planned.”
Magic!
And here we are with my first non-blog.
Diane is passionate about astrology. She said we just had a full moon in Virgo, which is about keeping routines. We also just experienced the Sun conjunct Venus, which is about encouraging you to take “me time”, ie relax, take time for yourself, take a nap. There was a distinct conflict happening astrologically last week between keeping routines and taking time for self. She pointed out I was experiencing this conflict in my attempt to write a blog. This was a wonderful sanity check!
What can be learned from this?
What might be your takeaway from this non-blog?
- It is important to honour your rhythms
- Enjoy feeding chickadees (and other experiences that delight you!)
- Know when to surrender… Allow flow. Allow grace. Allow ease.
- Reach out to community when you are stuck.
- Trust the Universe. It will provide.
- Honour your commitments AND your wellbeing by growing through the tricky spots with creativity and integrity.
- Understand the love beneath your commitments, and let that love illuminate the promise.
? ? ? I’m sending a lot of pink love out to you with this post ? ? ?
I’m wishing some grace for you today to find the way through your tricky spots. There seems to be an endless supply of support and creative options, if we can only open our hearts to the basis of goodness and care always available within life.
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Deana Hills
Hi Andrea,
I want to thank you for your perseverance in investigating sexual abuse in the Shambala community.
I hears the radio show Tapestry with Mary Hynes yesterday while driving in my car. I came home and listened to the part 1. Twice.
I was spiritually and sexually abused in my 20’s while I was an active member in the United Church of Canada. I finally reported the abuse to the church Presbytery. I wasn’t the only woman in the congregation to be abused, but it was my report that sparked the action to have the minister “defrocked”
The church did not have any policy on sexual abuse at the time so I was left on my own to try and put the pieces of my life back together. I went to the police but they deterred me from making any charges.
So I got on with my life, trying to bury the pain and prove my worth by getting an education and working hard. I was married and had two children at the time of the abuse, so I was also trying to repair my relationship with my family.
So after 35 years and a divorce, I met a woman by chance who works for the United Church in the dental office where I was working. After some light conversation I mentioned I had been a member of the church but something happens years ago that caused me to leave. She asked more questions and we realized she knew of the events.
That chance meeting left me very upset. It was like the old wound I had tried so hard to ignore had opened up.
I have been seeing a counsellor for a few months now, but upon hearing the radio program I finally have heard voices expressing the pain I have experienced.
I am so encouraged by your tenacity and bravery!
Thanks
Andrea M. Winn
Deana, thank you so much for leaving this comment. I am hosting a live healing event on April 20th. If you are interested in joining, just email me at andrea@healyourheartthroughmeditation.ca ??